Miracles News
Fall 2004

Hijacked!

by Rev. Myron Jones

I had been so excited for a couple of weeks as I anticipated a wonderful week at Pathways. I was co-facilitating 920: Being a Miracle Worker with Rev. Barbara Kraetsch.

I was so pleased to be working with Barbara and was looking forward to seeing some old friends and making some new ones. It took some doing to get my work schedule arranged so that I could take off some time for this, especially since I was taking off a couple of extra days. I didn’t really need those extra days, but I really wanted them. I love being at Pathways, and always come back renewed and ready to tackle anything.

Besides co-facilitating my first course for Pathways (which was thrilling enough), I would also be recording a DVD. Wow! A minister of God and a star; who would have thought! With all this to look forward to, you can imagine how upset I was when the day before I was scheduled to fly out, I woke up with a sore throat. I could hardly talk. How on earth was I going to fully participate in the coming weekend if this kept up? So, I asked Holy Spirit, “What’s up with this?”

I didn’t stop long enough to listen, though. I had last minute customers to take care of, and lots to do before I left. By the middle of the day, I was feeling pretty sick and had a fever. Now I was paying more attention, but I wasn’t getting much. I mean I was asking what was going on, but I wasn’t really hearing anything. I went to the doctor and got plenty of medicine. I worried a lot. But I was still sick.

I called my mind healing partner, Loretta, and told her what was going on. I asked what she thought I should do. Loretta asked me if I was nervous about the coming weekend and I said that I was a little, but not enough to make me sick. She suggested that I journal and see if I could get an answer that way. My friend Linda, who is good at journaling once told me that three is the magic number. She said that if I am journaling to get an answer I should always write at least three pages. I guess it must take that long to let the ego voice itself so you can get to the good stuff.

I don’t have the kind of patience that it takes to do a lot of journaling, but this obviously called for extreme action, so I sat down in my favorite chair and took up pen. I asked the Holy Spirit why I was sick, and what did He want me to learn from this? This is what I got on the third page (guess you were right, Linda):

The Course says that sickness is a decision. I made a decision to be sick. I began to feel that I had to perform well because people would be expecting it of me. I didn’t tell myself that — at least not out loud — but that is what was going on in the background. And that is what was making me sick. I started off with the right idea. When I was ordained, I told the Holy Spirit that I was ready to do my work. I said that I would show up wherever He needed me and do my best to get out of His way. I would always try to be a useful channel for Him — to say or do what was needed.

That was my intention for this weekend also, but somewhere along the way I got hijacked by the ego. I began to think this was about me. With the ego involved, my joy turned to fear and anxiety. My ego was trying to get me out of this scary situation using the same method that had always worked in the past. I would get sick and not have to participate. Less would be expected of me and then there would be less chance of failure.

“So,” I asked, “What am I supposed to do now? How do I get my life back from the ego?” Knowing what not to do isn’t the same as knowing what to do. Please tell me in a clear way that I can understand what I need to know.” I knew that the answer was there waiting for me to see it.

I thanked the Holy Spirit for these useful insights, and invited Him to come into my mind and show me another way to see this. I confirmed my original intention to be useful in any way He needs me. I gave Him all my fears and uncertainties. I picked up a nearby copy of the Course and opened it at random. I was in Chapter 4 of the Text, Section 1. Paragraph 7 jumped out at me. It said, “Your worth is not established by teaching or learning. Your worth is established by God. As long as you dispute this everything you do will be fearful, particularly any situation that lends itself to the belief in superiority and inferiority.” Well, that was just about perfect for the situation, wasn’t it?

This turned out to be one of those golden opportunities. I learned a lot as I worked my way through this situation. I found that it was not as easy as I thought it would be to lay aside my ego concerns. I sacrificed my peace to my ego fears. But I knew that I was doing what I was supposed to do, so I stayed with it. After it was all over, I could see that all my fears were groundless, and isn’t that always the case? I was also pleased that I continued to seek guidance and did my best to listen.

In the future, it is my intention to divert all ego hijackings right at the beginning before the ego can get a foot in the door, because once in, the ego is harder to dislodge. I can see that if I had stopped immediately on noting my anxiety, and gone straight to the Holy Spirit with my concerns, I could have avoided most of the nervousness I felt, and would have enjoyed my week more.

Rev. Myron Jones is a Pathways of Light minister living in Lake Charles, Louisiana.

Email: revmyron@hotmail.com

Love Is Here

by Colleen McNally

Colleen McNally is a Pathways of Light student living in Crystal Lake, Illinois.

Email: colleenmac64@hotmail.com

Pruning My Mind of the Ego

by Rev. Christine Anderson

Can Holy Spirit get through to me even while I am performing the most menial of tasks? Yes. The Holy Spirit is now teaching me through the avenue of growing tomatoes.

I enjoy the activity of gardening. I find it relaxing and maybe I’m more willing to open to the input of His helpful insights while I’m in the garden. (I can be crabby or stressful in the garden too, it all depends on what kind of story I am making up in my mind.) I know that I can hear His Voice anytime. It is not a matter of location —that is important in real estate. It is a matter of which voice do I want to hear? My ‘real estate’ is living at Home in Heaven with God. With the help of the Holy Spirit, I am working with training my mind to open again to the awareness of Home.

There are some areas where I am more willing to accept His help and other areas where I am putting up a little resistance. “Let me do this little part myself,” I say. Or maybe I’m afraid that if I listen and follow, there will have to be a change that will not be comfortable for me. All I can do, with the help of the Holy Spirit, is do the best I can with letting go of the ego scripts. There is no hurry. This is not a race. We are all going home together.

I need to remember also that Spirit will not judge what I hand over for healing. I am the one who judges. “Oh not this one. I can’t let Holy Spirit see this lollapalooza! I’ll put this one on the bottom of the pile. It can be last.”

When I go to Spirit and ask, ”What would you have me look at and let go of today?” I can trust in His wisdom. He surely knows better than I. I could be mistaken. I have made believing in the illusion a habit for so long that I need a holy Helper to give me the discernment as to what’s real and what’s unreal.

In 2000 I moved back home to live with my mother. Every summer, I put out great effort to impress Mom with my tomato crop. In January she moved to a senior residence, so I don’t have her to impress — what a silly idea! Truthfully though, I am finding less and less value in impressing others. It works better for me to just follow Spirit and stay in the flow of the joy that comes with following Inner Guidance. With mom’s selling of the house, I’ve moved to a new location which has a big yard with a lovely 12 X 12 patch of dirt — my new tomato patch!

How lush were the plants! Why, there was one plant that was 3 feet in diameter! What a proud city farmer I was! I had planted late and had not put the plants in the ground at the same time. They were all at different stages of growth. People in the neighborhood have passed by and made comments about the beauty of the garden. I beam with pride as I reveal to them my secret combination to success — plant food, hormone spray and plenty of water. The tomatoes have really become a nice way to meet my new neighbors.

September rolled around so quickly and I became concerned about what there was left of the growing season. I asked my friend Mary, who was raised on a farm, how much more time I had for these lovely green balls to turn red before the first frost. While I was at it, I bragged about the lushness of my plants. Imagine my surprise when she explained to me that to speed up the ripening of the fruit before the arrival of the cold weather, I would need to remove the sucker branches. I asked her what those were and she told me that they were the branches that didn’t have any tomatoes on them. (These branches take up the energy of the plant and if they are removed, the energy will go to the fruit.)

I had noticed that when I walked through the garden to weed or pick, the branches of the plants stuck out so far that by brushing against them, I would inadvertently break them off. The cages that were supposed to support the plants were leaning over to the ground from the weight of the numerous huge tomatoes.

I looked around with mixed feelings at all that had come about by my own efforts. I was feeling like these plants were getting out of hand, like Mickey Mouse in Fantasia with all of the brooms! I felt discouraged that they were getting damaged. I looked underneath all of the showy vegetation to find long vines with tomatoes on the ground. There were gnats way inside the plants and I was having a hard time reaching the tomatoes to pick them off of the vines. I thought about how that useless vegetation was hiding the fruit from me. By the time I could get to it, the birds and bugs were enjoying their own little banquet. The tomatoes were cracked and useless. They were falling to the ground and rotting.

So I started to consider the suggestion my friend had given me. I made a ‘shift’ in my mind to seeing this situation differently. Instead of being discouraged about breaking branches, I realized it was just part of the weeding out process — removing the unneeded branches. The only remedy was to cut away the sucker branches. After pruning the branches, strong wooden stakes and straw were used to support the plants.

As I opened my mind to receive the lesson of all of this from the Holy Spirit, I got the revelation that there is a parallel in my mind to those sucker branches. For me it is thinking there is value in idolizing form. ACIM tells us that form is the ego’s attempt to prove that separation really happened. Yet it really does seem that there is a you over there, a me over here, and tomatoes in my yard. However, the truth is that we are one Self. Our dense physical bodies and senses seem so convincing. Beyond every form and filling every space is only God’s Love. There is no place where God is not!

Form is neutral in the dream. It only has the meaning I give to it. I have made form special in my life, thinking that the more stuff I had, the safer I would be. Now I am seeing that I become a prisoner of all that I hold on to with an ‘iron tight’ grip. Just like those sucker branches were hiding the tomatoes from me, everything and anything — people, places or things (even tomatoes) that I make more important than remembering that Love is all there is — are cutting off the awareness of the fruits of my Spirit from me — the deep peace, the heavenly Love, the great joy.

Through this lesson it became clearer to me that I can make tomatoes or any form my life special, but is that really what I want? I would rather see myself as a caretaker of form. That is to take much care to be sure to ask for Spirit’s guidance as to the use of form. I want to ask, “What would be truly helpful in the plan of awakening regarding this form that I am considering to take up space in my life? Is this form for the highest good, or is this form just a substitute for the awareness of my spiritual fruits? Am I looking to form to fill a seeming gap that can only be corrected by the master gardener, Jesus, as he gently uproots the false thinking in the garden of my mind?”

It makes sense to me that all of this which seems to be about tomatoes in the dream has a spiritual significance, a parallel somewhere in my mind. If I ask Holy Spirit to give me the lesson, it will come into my awareness. What am I allowing to live in my mind that has no reality to it? How do I spend the major amount of my time? Is it really time well spent with ‘waking up’ as the theme? How much of my life is just fluff! Are my little decorative doodads that I put on shelves growing over the fruits of my Spirit? Am I so absorbed in the ‘stuff’ of the world that I have covered up my Beingness in exchange for nothing? The ‘stuff’ can also show up in my mind as attitudes like, “It has to be my way,” or “I’m not good enough.”

The garden is a good place to learn lessons where I can hear just the way that I need to — planting tomatoes. Holy Spirit knows that in reality there are no tomatoes and He does not judge me for believing that they are real. I am also aware that I don’t have to make growing tomatoes my life’s purpose. The tomatoes are the dream props. He knew that they would be a good vehicle for my learning. Spirit’s Voice is becoming more familiar. The more that I practice listening to and following Inner Guidance, I see that the result is peace, ease and great joy!

There is nothing magic about hearing Holy Spirit’s Voice. It expresses in the form of ideas that are compatible to my repertoire of experiences. Spirit meets in the room of today’s understanding. Anything and everything that has brought me confusion or that I have made special will become a teaching aid with my offering of a little bit of my willingness to Him.

The healing in my mind through this lesson has helped me to open to the awareness of the spiritual abundance within me. (This abundance has nothing to do with form. The use of form, when guided by Spirit, can be used in helping us to wake up.) I am learning to give without fear, to give love freely, without conditions. The ego no longer has my permission to critique, judge or limit the little “love assignments” being given to me by Spirit. (Those little acts and thoughts of kindness that really are helpful, when directed by Spirit. You know, like the phone call, the little note or card, the email, the smile to the cashier at the grocery, extending love via the One Mind we share. These are just to name a few!)

In the dream, I have an abundance of tomatoes and it has been with great joy that I have been giving them away. A blessing goes with every one. It is wonderful to give from a place of abundance and not fear. I had an old ego script that told me if I give, I will have less. That is just a lie and I don’t believe it!

My gardening with Holy Spirit has helped me to realize that anywhere I think I am is a heavenly place as I keep my connection strong and receive His messages of helpfulness all day long!

Rev. Christine Anderson is a Pathways of Light minister who lives in Chicago, Illinois.

Email: revhappywoman@prodigy.net

Surrounded by Love

by Rev. Deb Frantz

As I write this, I am working on Workbook Lesson 264: “I am surrounded by the love of God.” What does this mean to be surrounded? For me, as it is still early in the morning, I think of warm, snuggly covers and the feeling it inspires. It is a feeling of warmth, a feeling of security, a feeling that I am comfortable where I am in the moment. That is the same with the Love of God.

I made the transition to complete devotion to Spirit’s work awhile ago. And in doing so, that commitment led me to becoming a resident staff person at Pathways of Light. Upon arriving, the peace and quiet sunk in. No more were the sounds of the city filling my ears. I look up at night and see millions of brilliant stars not hid by the lights of city living. I fall asleep to the soothing sounds of crickets in the night, gently rocking me to my night’s slumber.

After a few days, the ego thoughts that I was not worthy and deserving of such love and peace surfaced. As the fearful thoughts begin their tirade, I felt saddened. Opening into peace became difficult. Quieting my mind became challenging. Fear followed me, since it is in my mind. It does not matter what the outside surroundings look like or how peaceful they seem. What I experience comes from inside me. Experiences from the past came to mind in various forms. I was reminded of the life I had previously in which I was constantly trying to prove my worth. I do not believe that I was aware that I was doing just that, but through my continued awakening it became clear. I struggled for many years with depression. Depression over my life circumstances and all that has occurred in my life.

Through the awakening process, I came to realize that I was responsible for the seed of fear and doubt within my mind that created my outside soap operas. When a dear friend shared about feeling like a square peg being forced into a round hole and making a major change, I had an “a-ha!” moment as I had realized that for so very long, I had been feeling the same thing.

I had tried to become what I thought the world wanted me to become, but my goals were always just out of reach. I experienced little victories and then huge disappointments.

The real world, the world of God, lets us know that happiness is already our birthright and is deep within us, past all the veils of loneliness, fear and suffering. This gem of Light from the Father is His Love that He shares with us. It radiates through us and each ray is a ray of love, peace, compassion, joy, trust, happiness and more. It is truly what we are.

For so long, I had focused on what the world desired me to be. For so long, I focused on the judgment that came along with my participation in the world. For so long, I was unhappy in that knowing.

I am here today with a new knowledge, a knowledge of what my Father offers me. He offers me the truth. When I realize that truth within, I can then forgive the illusion of this world. What I believe within me, even down to the lowest level, I will see reflected in this world. If I choose the Father’s Love and the truth of who I am and who my brothers are, then I will look upon a world forgiven.

In going back to the idea of surrounding myself with His Love, I see how I have chosen to not be at peace with it. For me at one time, the very idea of being surrounded could seem more like being suffocated. In a dysfunctional setting, as the ego and this world represents, it seems possible that I could be choked. The ego only desires torture and death. If I surrender myself to God’s Love, then to the ego that means that I am making a huge sacrifice of my control and my will. In the setting of Heaven, where only Love abides, I am simply being One with God. And God’s Will is my will.

It is a glorious uplifting of my spirit to know that I can choose again. The decisions I have made in the past have been unloving to my brothers and to myself. Now I make the only choice that I can now make, a choice made with love. In choosing love, I choose Life in God.

The past does not have to grip my mind with fear. I do not have to worry about what could have been had I traveled this path, or not made that decision to do thus. I can release my mind from this fear by remaining in the present, accepting the peace of God and enjoying the quiet contentment that comes from resting in Him.

God is the only choice that I can make now. His Love envelops me and lifts me higher than before. Healing continues and for that I am grateful.

As I closed this article and put it aside to review before submission, I was met with more obstacles to my peace that became yet another “lesson to learn and a blessing to earn” as a dear friend of mine would say. I was blessed to have the support of the staff here at Pathways of Light to assist me with bringing the darkness to the Light.

In the vision that I was receiving during the counseling, I was first surrounded by beautiful angels that sent unimaginable amounts of Love to me. The warmth was so comforting. They reached out their hands as if to tell me that I was safe and secure and that they were with me always. I began to feel that our energies were blending, and I saw the beings and myself now as One in radiant white Light. The sounds of ancient melodies and harmonies calmed my aching heart. I received a further vision of a lighthouse. The lighthouse stood as a pillar, its strength undeniable. No matter what the weather or what storms may come and go, my strength stands tall in God. As I realize my strength in Him, I am realizing the Love. This Love that I extend is like the light from a lighthouse shining far and wide, providing safe harbor to all within reach. With this vision, I accepted great healing within my mind. I accepted my function and my purpose to forgive and to extend the Love. By my doing so, I remember we are all truly surrounded by the Love of God.

Rev. Deb Frantz is a Pathways of Light minister living at Pathways of Light in Kiel, WI

Email: revdeb@pathwaysoflight.org

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